Throw everything away, forget about it all. Relax a little bit, give life a chance to flow its own way, unassisted by your mind and effort. Stop directing the river’s flow!
Actually, being what you are is the simplest. What is difficult is to stop being what you are not. Because we wish to keep hold of our attachments. Freedom is to be free of attachments and the main attachment is to the ‘I’-self.
Leave your existence to existence, stop caring for yourself so much and let the Universe care for you; it is the best mother. There has to be some trust, not just belief, because trust is intimate.